Change of Heart

Friday I was having a pretty crappy day. This is not shocking considering the fact that more days than not I am in a completely miserable mood. I’m not sure if it is all hormones, the fact that I have been in the house for pretty much a month 24/7 or some combination of all of it. I don’t even leave the house to go to work because I work here. From here. Live here. You get the point. Anyway, he came home Friday night and we decided ahead of time that we were going to go to our favorite Vietnamese restaurant in town for dinner. He gets home a little late but considering traffic on a Friday I just assumed it was the usual… until I saw all of this.

The flowers and card were because I “kick ass” and he also got me a gift card to Victoria’s Secret to get new yoga pants and undies to make me feel all special all under. The card was blank on the inside with his own hand written message to me and nearly made this hormonal mess cry… again. Because that’s what I do. I cry. At everything.

So that was super sweet and we head to dinner and start talking about how both of our parents are coming out in September for a week because a Crosby, Stills and Nash are coming to Red Rocks. The concert falls on the day that I have my 20 week ultrasound and they can tell us the gender of the baby, if we want. I was fine not knowing. Way more fine that I ever expected to be about waiting until the birth to know if we get stuck with a girl or a boy. He has decided that it would be fun, since both of our parents will be in town, to have the ultrasound tech put it in an envelope and do one of those gender reveal parties, where you give it to a baker and they make the filling of the cake pink or blue and you find out with everyone at the same time when you cut into the cake, the day after. It seems like it will be fun. I’m sure it will be fun. Until the cake is pink. Everyone already seems to be positive that we are having a girl so confirming their hunches is one thing, but the last thing I want to do is melt down into a puddle of tears after we cut into the damn cake. He has already accepted a girl and would be excited right out of the gate. I’m concerned that I’m going to take more convincing and that, yet again, I’ll be pegged as a heartless non maternal woman.

You can’t pre-order unless you adopt. I get that. I really do. Now if someone could return my normal rational brain we could all have a pow wow and be on the same page that girls are pretty cool too and that you’d love either just the same that would be SUPER. Kthanksbye.