This is tough. I want to be happy for my friends. My in person friends who are showing this adorable baby bump and are so happy to be mommies for the first time or again. I find myself focusing back on myself and my apparent fertility issues that are currently occurring. Selfish? Probably.. But get over it. This is my blog so feel free to leave the page now.
I find myself wanting a tiny human of my/our own more than I ever have, which isn't saying much considering I haven't had a human to human maternal bone in my body for as long as I can remember. Then I think of how I really like my life. Granted... I managed to decide to buy a house with room for a family of 7 or more, but I digress. I love to travel. I love my dogs. I love my freedom. And I love Sex and The City. The specific episode I saw today focused on how women are "should"ing themselves. "Should" have to fall in love and find the perfect life, which most commonly involves a sleu of children and the perfect house and man. I feel like I have the perfect man for me. Is perfect for us meaning we should have a family other than what we have? I feel confused more days than not. I get that there is no perfect time and you will never feel as though it is a right time.
I guess you just dive in. The way you dive in to moving 2000 miles across the country.
Life raft please?
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